Huffington Post put up this video recently. It's a clip from a horrific show on TLC called "Toddlers & Tiaras" (which is about exactly what the title implies) that depicts one of the pageant mothers forcing her crying five year-old daughter to get her eyebrows waxed. The girl was traumatized from a previous waxing session during which her skin was ripped off.



Pure child abuse, and a prime example of how gender roles and beauty expectations operate in a vicious cycle. I'm sure this pageant mother's parent(s) forced the same twisted values on her. Even though I don't plan to have kids in my lifetime, sometimes I wish I could raise a daughter, if only to teach her that her self-worth goes beyond having well-shaped eyebrows.

Found many-a interesting things while perusing the web on my Sunday afternoon, so here's a nice little round-up for y'all.

• If you need your daily dose of disgust, you can read about the opposition to building mosques near Ground Zero.


• For those of you who haven't heard, an appeal has already been filed against the Prop 8 ruling. No one's particularly surprised.


• From The New Gay: Queers You Should Know: Fred Karger, Our First Gay President?


• In honor of World Breastfeeding Week (which ended yesterday), Kimberly Seals Allers wrote a piece for Women's eNews about the low breastfeeding rates amongst black mothers.


• I found this absolutely horrific but thought it served as a good reminder of the lengths people will go to in order to protect their precious gender roles. A man allegedly beat his girlfriend's 17-month-old son to death because he wasn't acting "manly" enough.


• From AlterNet: In States Where "Gun Ed" Is Prevalent, Comprehensive Sex Ed Is Nowhere to Be Found.


• Another one from AlterNet: The GOP Fights to Make African-Americans Sicker and Poorer.


• Scenes from an anti-choice abortion-kills-black-babies protest.


• Ironically, Lucky magazine airbrushed Jessica Simpson to make her look thinner in her photo for an article about how much she loves her body.


• Jane Lynch. Hosting SNL in October. 'Nuff said.


• Thank goodness for Rachel Maddow and her ability to take on offensive media powerhouses, e.g. Bill O'Reilly.

August 1st-7th is:

World Breastfeeding Week


World Breastfeeding Week's purpose is to raise awareness about the numerous benefits of breastfeeding and to encourage society to stop viewing it as some sort of pornographic act that belongs in the home. New mothers have every right to breastfeed when and where they feel it necessary, but unfortunately we still have to fight for that right.

Learn more about what you can do in honor of World Breastfeeding Week at the official website.

To my wonderful dad, and all the other wonderful dads out there. Fatherhood is undeniably a feminist issue because it's up to us to promote positive parenting that transcends gender stereotypes. To demonstrate, I'm re-posting this adorable and heart-warming ad from Fatherhood.gov.



And one more!



We can only hope for more people to be lucky enough to have feminist daddies :)

Although I'm sure many of us have our issues with the overly-commercialized "Hallmark" holiday that is Mother's Day, I can't imagine many of us have issues with honoring the women in our life who have made us who we are. That's how I see Mother's Day. Not everyone is lucky enough to have a mother like Lorelai Gilmore, but I sincerely hope that we are all lucky enough to have strong women role models in our lives.

Living with my mom hasn't always been the easiest task. I have nothing but happy memories of her as a kid - from her ability to always act as if I had given her diamonds for her birthday when really all I gave her was a bunch of pictures I scribbled, to her tendency to always stand up for me when I felt the wrath of my dad's temper (not to say that I don't love my dad - I love him very much, but the man can sure yell). But by nine years-old, she had been diagnosed with a nightmarish disease that over the years, has attacked her body and mind. At 57 years-old, though she needs constant care and is essentially wheelchair-bound, she is still kickin', defying all odds. There is a 50% chance I have inherited the disease from her, and while I don't know yet if I have it or not because I'm not at the point where I'm ready to take the test, I'm sure I inherited her never-give-up, don't-take-shit attitude. Go mom.

We have had our fair share of fights, as the disease attacked her ability to think rationally which made it increasingly difficult to be around her, but I have nothing but love for my mom. And not only was I blessed with an awesome mother, but also an older sister who looks out for me, defends me when people give me crap for being a feminist, and in a few weeks, will be sharing a house with me. I see how my mom's older sister treats her with nothing but the utmost care and love, and I know that if either my sister or me were affected by the disease (Heaven forbid) it would be no different. Because that's what women do, or should do, for each other.

So go give the women in your life big hugs, and tell 'em why they rock. Also, feel free to comment with your stories. Now, enough with the mushy stuff. I feel I have to post the hilarious video I always think of whenever Mother's Day is mentioned.

Saw this on Women's eNews, and wow!

LaNisa Allen was terminated from her job after she took "unauthorized" breaks to pump breast milk. As a result, she sued her former employers, claiming that the company violated the Pregnancy Discrimination Act and the Americans with Disabilities Act.

Unfortunately, the Ohio Supreme Court ruled 7 to 2 that she was rightly terminated for taking extra breaks. But in his dissenting opinion, Justice Paul E. Pfeifer wrote:

The appellate court does not explain why Allen's trips to the restroom outside scheduled break times were different from the restroom trips other employees made outside scheduled break times. There is no evidence in the record about any limit on the length of unscheduled restroom breaks and no evidence that employees had to seek permission from a supervisor to take an unscheduled restroom break. There is evidence only that unscheduled bathroom breaks were allowed and that LaNisa Allen was fired for taking them. What made her breaks different?

New mothers simply have to pump breast milk if they choose to breastfeed their newborn(s). If a workplace can allow bathroom and cigarette breaks, they certainly can allow this. Ohio needs to launch the same initiative that Vermont has, which requires workplaces to provide private and comfortable accommodations for new mothers to pump breast milk. It's upsetting that women have to go through an extensive legal process to gain a right they should have in the first place.

How do we, as feminists, raise our children to be free from gender constraints? Well, according to the New York Times, one Swedish couple knows how. Currently, only a handful of close relatives know the gender of their two year-old child, and that's it. The child's gender is kept a secret from anyone else, and the child is simply called "Pop."

"We want Pop to grow up more freely and avoid being forced into a specific gender mould from the outset," Pop's mother told the Swedish newspaper Svenska Dagbladet last spring. "It's cruel to bring a child into the world with a blue or pink stamp on their forehead."

Pop wears dresses, and also "male" styled pants, and Pop's hairstyle changes often, from traditionally feminine to traditionally masculine (and, one would imagine, to some untraditional styles now and then.)

I agree that the manner in which conformity and stereotypes are thrust onto children at the youngest of ages is disturbing. However, will this do more harm than good? Is it wrong to thrust our feminist agendas onto our children? Will this lead to resentment and confusion on the child's part? It's difficult to answer these questions, so if anyone can offer their opinion, I'm all ears. I think it's wonderful that they're trying to break out of a gendered society, but it's important to ask these questions before doing so.

Having a genderless child, however, is a great way to challenge the rigid manner in which a gendered society is run. Which bathroom will Pop use? Which line will Pop join when teachers split the class up into a boys' line and a girls' line in the hallway? Undoubtedly, Pop's activist parents will confront those who are responsible for these sexist set-ups, perhaps leading to people changing their own behaviors and challenging stereotypes, but is it ethical to use a child as an instrument to break the patriarchy?

A complex situation, to say the least. Still, I admire the courage and the strong values of Pop's parents. It's not easy to be in the small minority of those who challenge gender roles.

There's an article on CNN about children of same-sex couples - the "gayby boom" generation (not too sure how fond I am of the term) - and it really shows how important these daughters and sons are in the fight for gay rights. It also shows that children of same-sex couples are often very loved and grow up to be well-adjusted and not confused about their sexuality, contrary to what anti-gay rights activists might want you to think.

Jesse Levey is a Republican activist who says he believes in family values, small government and his lesbian mothers' right to marry.

Levey is part of the "gayby boom" generation. The 29-year-old management consultant is the son of a lesbian couple who chose to have a child through artificial insemination. He's their only child.

Critics of same-sex marriage say people such as Levey will grow up shunned and sexually confused. Yet he says he's a "well-adjusted heterosexual" whose upbringing proves that love, not gender, makes a family.

"You can imagine what my parents thought when I was 13 and listening to Rush Limbaugh everyday," Levey says. "But my family had strong family values. I was raised in a loving, caring household that let me be a free thinker."

The modern gay rights movement began 40 years ago June 28 during the Stonewall Riots in New York City. While much of the controversy surrounding gay rights today has centered on same-sex marriage, a battle is brewing over another family issue: Is it bad for children to be raised by gay or lesbian parents.

Read the rest of the article here, and comment with your reactions!

There's a heartbreaking, but worthwhile, piece up at Ms. Magazine entitled "Between a Woman and Her Doctor," in honor of Dr. George Tiller. It tells the story of a woman who is devastated when she finds out that her unborn child is dead inside of her. Not being able to cope with the idea of giving birth to a dead fetus, she goes on a seemingly impossible quest to obtain a late-term abortion. This story shows why so many women in this world will suffer without more people like the late Dr. Tiller.

Why must we always discuss the mothering skills of female politicians? Why did so many people concern themselves with analyzing whether or not Sarah Palin had the "time" to be both a mother and a vice president, but we never saw any type of news story titled, "Can John McCain Juggle Both Presidency and Fatherhood"?

Oh right. 'Cause we're living in a patriarchal society in which women couldn't possibly juggle both a career and a family, and if she does - GASP! - she's an anomaly! Call CNN to interview her, quick!

I'm hoping I can send some PO'ed feminists over to the Daily Mail Online to leave negative comments on a highly offensive opinion piece written by Helen Kirwan-Taylor, entitled "Why DO babies turn so many brilliant women into slummy mummies?" The title basically explains it.

It might sound brutal, but this is a short, but crucial juncture in any relationship. Women have to see that their marriage matters as much as their children.

At a time when divorce is on the rise and families are breaking up, it seems even more important for women to --consider their other halves.

Men have a profound interest in their own children, but they also have adult sexual human urges - women ignore them at their peril.

When a woman puts her child first, she is making a choice.

For every mother with greasy hair and a flabby bum (even though she can afford gym membership) who has lost interest in herself and the world, there is a husband ready to go on the prowl.

Apparently, women exist to look purdy for their menfolk, and the second a woman starts slacking on that responsibility, it is not by any means the fault of the man should he end up in bed with his secretary, because it was his wife who was stupid enough to gain 15 pounds and let her roots show.

What do you do when you have a wonderful program that provides federal funds to preventive healthcare and family planning services? If you're Senator David Vitter, you propose an amendment to drastically cut its funds.

Um, fail. This is awful. According to Planned Parenthood President Cecile Richards:

"This is the worst possible time for these outrageous attacks. More and more people are losing their jobs and their health insurance — and that means that safety-net providers like Planned Parenthood affiliate health centers are more important than ever. It's unconscionable to try to strip our funding at time when so many people are relying on us — but that's exactly what Sen. Vitter and his allies are trying to do."

Please take a minute to fill out this form on Planned Parenthood's website to tell your Senators to vote NO on this ridiculous amendment.

I hate to bombard you all with videos from The View, but I just had to post Ann Coulter's appearance on the show. She does get a little attacked by the five women, but notice the below-the-belt jabs Coulter dishes out herself. Normally I'm able to find at least some good in every person, but I don't have an ounce of respect for this woman. All she does is judge, judge, judge, without offering any type of compassion or solution to the "problems" she identifies. She is not intelligent - she merely regurgitates flimsy "evidence" that supports her outrageous ideas. I can't believe she has gotten so famous on this alone.

I was watching Dr. Phil (I usually can't stand to watch him, but I was flipping through channels and it caught my eye), and there were parents and child psychologists on to debate the issue of transgendered children. Three people believed it is not a choice and it is something to be embraced, and the other three believed that with special therapy, transgendered children can be "cured." I was searching on YouTube to find a video of it to post in here, but I couldn't find it - probably because it's too new. But I did come across this video of the same issue being debated on "The View." The video's rather old, but it's interesting to watch nonetheless.



The only one who is really opposed to breaking out of gender roles is Sherri Shepherd, who is very concerned with adhering to social norms and with steering her children into their narrow gender boxes. Her worst nightmare is her son putting on a dress.

This is interesting, and definitely says something about our culture. Facebook recently cracked down on female users who were - GASP! - posting pictures of them breastfeeding their babies. Now, personally I would never post pictures of myself breastfeeding, but women do it in public all the time - so why is Facebook so threatened by displays of motherhood?

This is a video of a man who challenged Facebook's moves by posting his own nipples on his profile and seeing their response.



Hm.

Fatherhood.gov put out a commercial to promote the importance of being a good dad. There's not much of a reason for me posting this here, other than I think it's really cute, and it takes a real man to be able to do this.

Happy Fathers' Day! I hope all of you have found some good way to celebrate it.

Barack Obama honored the holiday by addressing thousands of people in a predominantly black church - Apostolic Church of God. The topic of his speech was a very sensitive one: the absence of fathers in the African-American community. Obama has personal experience with this, since his own father was absent during his childhood. He addressed the fact that more than half of all black children live in single-parent households. Sad fact. From an article in The New York Times:

“Too many fathers are M.I.A, too many fathers are AWOL, missing from too many lives and too many homes,” Mr. Obama said, to a chorus of approving murmurs from the audience. “They have abandoned their responsibilities, acting like boys instead of men. And the foundations of our families are weaker because of it.”

On Friday, he announced that he would be a co-sponsor of a bill that will address absentee fathers. If passed, the bill will increase the enforcement of child support payments and help prevent domestic violence (yay).

This story makes me wonder if TV executives actually think before they act.

Recently, Teleflora, NBC, and several other companies ran an America's Favorite Mom special in honor of Mother's Day. The contestants were grouped into different categories - single moms, working moms, military moms. One of the categories was titled "non-moms" and consisted of grandmothers, stepmoms, and adoptive mothers. "Non-moms"? Wow, happy Mother's Day. I think we can all agree that these women are just as much mothers as those who have blood-related children.

After backlash, Teleflora immediately changed the title to "Adopting Moms." Their response:

"After closer examination, we can see how this may have been offensive to moms who have adopted children — moms who are indeed real moms to their children in every sense of the word. In fact, many of us at Teleflora are ‘adopting’ parents ourselves, including our president and owner."

I just wonder how they could possibly have let that slip by. Very insensitive move, if you ask me.

Full article here.

This is wonderful. New nursery programs in prisons are allowing imprisoned mothers more time to bond with their newborn babies. An article on Yahoo says that New York, Washington, Ohio, California, Nebraska, and soon West Virginia are all states that are a part of the growing trend of launching prison nurseries. The Indiana Women's Prison now allows new mothers to keep their babies with them up until eighteen months.

Studies show that children benefit from having extended contact with their mothers. Children who are separated from their imprisoned parents are more likely to have emotional problems, do poorly in school, and/or have trouble with the law.

In the end, it's better for both the child, and the mother.

Happy Mother's Day, by the way :) If you can, give big hugs to your mother, grandmother, aunt, etc.